We have been together for over seven years and we always knew that we wanted to have a family. Family is very important to us. Once finished our respective graduate studies, we felt we were ready to start the journey. We explored a few options (adoption, surrogacy etc.) but surrogacy felt like the right match for us, in part because it enabled a genetic connection.
That being said, cost was a concern for us as we were both just starting our careers. Because of this, we briefly considered international surrogacy, but we ultimately decided that US surrogacy was a better option because of the legal clarity, the structure and transparency of the process. This provided considerable peace of mind – which was really important for us. In addition, the ability to meet, interact and stay in touch with the GC was another huge benefit. While the quoted price of domestic surrogacy was higher, it was definitely worth it and we didn’t encounter any financial “surprises” along the way.
We were connected The Surrogacy Center through a friend, and our initial call with TSC was just to learn about the process generally. After hanging up the phone, we both remarked how much we liked them — they were very kind, patient, and thorough in their explanations. We talked to another couple that had worked with TSC before, and they had extremely positive reviews, so we decided they could be a good option for us, even though there are local surrogacy agencies in MA where we live.
In order to match us to a GC, TSC had a long discussion with us about our preferences for the pregnancy and desired relationship with the GC. After a couple months, we were notified that we had a potential match. We went out to WI and met with her and her family. It felt like a good match, but after a few weeks a complicating factor arose preventing us from working with her. TSC helped us through this rough patch, and got us connected with a new GC within a few months. She and her family were lovely, and we were very excited and thankful to get started.
While we were waiting for the match, we had selected a fertility clinic and egg donor. Fortunately, we were able to get those aspects completed in parallel and avoid delay. Legal paperwork (both with the fertility clinic and with the GC) also occurred during this time and was relatively straight-forward and painless.
After meeting the GC, we stayed in regular contact with her and her husband primarily by text, but also with occasional Skype calls. Our first attempt at embryo transfer was a momentous and nerve-wracking affair, and unfortunately, unsuccessful. However, we were able to try again in short order and just before Christmas, we learned that the second transfer had resulted in a pregnancy. We were elated.
During the next nine months, we stayed in frequent contact with the Surrogate, who gave us careful updates about all her medical visits and her experiences dealing with morning sickness and fielding curious questions from her daughter. We appreciated always knowing the full picture. At week 14, she sent us a surprise package in the mail that revealed the baby’s gender. We loved telling all our friends, family, and colleagues that we were expecting a baby girl. It was an extremely exciting time, and it was quite touching how excited people were for us. At the 20-week ultra sound, we “saw” our baby girl for the first time.
As we got closer to the due date, we planned our logistics. TSC helpfully gave us lots of advice about what to bring and where to stay. Our daughter ended up coming a couple weeks earlier than expected, so I am glad we were prepared. We arrived in time for her birth, and held her just moments after she was born. We were in love with her immediately.
We stayed in the hospital for a couple days. The hospital gave us our own room where we could bond with our baby girl and learn to handle and feed her. Meanwhile, the surrogate was recovering just a couple doors down the hall, which meant we could introduce our daughter to her and her family. We all got discharged on the same day. We took a bunch of photos and said our goodbyes and headed back to Boston, now as a family of three.
Our surrogate very kindly offered to provide breast milk. Our daughter grew healthy and strong, steadily improving her percentile on the growth chart. Thankfully, our daughter had a very easy temperament and slept well, which made us well-rested parents (relatively speaking). She is now almost a year old and is full of personality.
During this time, we have stayed in regular contact with the GC and her family, keeping them posted on our daughter’s growth with frequent photos and stories. We have started making rough plans for a second pregnancy with her, so needless to say we were incredibly happy and thankful for our experience working with her as well as TSC.